Stay Calm and Be the Love & Light of the World

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Image courtesy of “Planet With Stars” by artist xedos4. From http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

Whew! What a difference 24 hours makes! Saturday, I was fired up, disgusted, and angry at yet another Trump rant, and ready to fight. Today, I am choosing to embody love, light, and forgiveness – because radical, unapologetic, unrelenting love is what will transform everything that needs to change.

We celebrate Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s life today and I realized that we all have inherited the radical love and light he possessed. We sometimes forget this beautiful inheritance, when we see an out picturing of hate coming our way or when we, ourselves are acting out. But, as Dr. King said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

If I want things to change, things cannot change with the same energy that it already is. It has to change from the opposite of what it embodies. In this case, when someone is acting like an ass, I need not act an ass along with them. I show them the love that I wish to see and be.

What brought on this change? Two things – exhaustion and my loving Healing Reike Circle. I was mentally exhausted from all the news reports of a certain president elect acting un-presidential – yet again. All of this negative energy caused me to forget my own inheritance of peace and love. I was frustrated, hurt and felt like I was trapped in a country that is hell-bent on self-destructing.

Reike is a healing modality that combines beautiful intention, love, and healing hands to another. Each person gets a turn at having loving, healing hands sending healing love energy and the person on the table gets a chance to receive love. In giving love to my healing circle friends, I realized that just as I can give love to these lovely people, I can give love to others who may not like me or agree with my views. Love will boomerang back to me, because that is the Law of Cause and Effect and the Law of Attraction (like attracts like). What I put out into the world will boomerang back to me and what is attracted to me.

Here are a few tips on being the light and love of the world:

  • Before responding to a negativity, ask yourself if this is even worthy of your energy. If it is, then ask how can love be infused into the situation.
  • Pray for (or meditate on) the person or situation that is causing angst in your heart and life. The power of prayer transforms from near and far, and moves hearts closer.
  • Remember and hold the vision of a peaceful, cooperative, and loving world. You may not be able to do this in the heat of the moment of a debate or rant, but when you have a chance (each day), take some time to envision all that you want to experience. We spend so much time focusing on what we don’t want, that little time or energy is directed towards what we actually do want.

By no means am I condoning suppressing your beliefs to make someone else feel more comfortable or less threatened by different views. But, I am saying to take a moment to ask yourself if you could benefit from hearing someone else’s point of view or at least empathize from where they are coming from. Perhaps once they feel they are heard, they will then be ready to listen. The only way we can move forward is through MUTUAL respect.

No matter what, we still have to keep our inheritance of peace and love close and near, especially because that’s what most of want to have in our experience. Brotherly, universal love was here before the election, and it will be here well beyond four years. We cannot lose sight of the big picture, based on others’ immaturity and ill-will. Even when we have to navigate into and through the negativity, we should remember our birthright and not be so fast to toss our love aside when it is that very thing that will save us all.  Our aim should always be to fly through and above the negativity, not to wallow and roll around in it.

I will try to follow my own advice, especially next time I see or hear something that is not in alignment with what I want to experience. I will ask – how can I be the love and light in this situation?

~Your Curator of All Things Inspirational, Kimberly Jo Cooley

Revisit: Thank you Mr. Mandela, for Teaching the Cycle of Forgiveness

I originally wrote this blog post following Nelson Mandela’s death in December 2013 and I needed a refresher on the subject of forgiveness and resentment. This post deals with forgiveness in love relationships, but it really speaks to all situations that is calling for  forgiveness and letting go of resentment. My 2015 self made some edits to my 2013 post :-).

Image courtesy of "Lonely Tree" by Evgeni Dinev, from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

Image courtesy of “Lonely Tree” by Evgeni Dinev, from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

“As I walked out the door toward my freedom I knew that if I did not leave all the anger, hatred and bitterness behind, that I would still be in prison.”

“Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.”

-Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela passed away today, at the age of 95. Nelson Mandela’s life – long, fruitful, inspirational, fraught with pain and struggle, triumph and victory – is something we all should aspire to be. I thank him for all the teaching moments his life brought to my life and his spirit and legacy lives on forever.

Below is a question posed to me on the subject of forgiveness and my response:

Q. Can you share your thoughts about forgiveness? I’ve always heard how people chose to forgive someone who hurt them deeply in one way or another in order to help them move on. What does that mean and how do you accomplish it?

Letting go. Time truly heals many wounds but in the meantime, how can one work on letting go of a situation? Is it best to force yourself to not think about it, i.e. whenever the thought crosses your mind, change the subject so to speak? Or do you try to keep busy and occupy yourself so as to distract you?

How does one remain hopeful of love and marriage? Is there really truly somebody for everybody?

A. Forgiveness. Such a heavy proposition, isn’t it? Why should we have to forgive those who trespass us?

It’s just as much about you as it is the person whose being forgiven, if not more about you. Not forgiving holds us back, dims and dulls our life’s experiences, and drags us down.

Nelson Mandela’s first quote above is not talking about the brick and mortar prison he sat in for 27 years for anti-Apartheid activities. He’s talking about the prison of our minds – the bondage of holding in resentment. His quote can help us better understand the notion of forgiveness in relationships and how it is necessary for moving on to bigger and better love. If we cannot let go of the pain, bitterness, anger, and resentment, then we will never fully move into the present of the here and now. The here and now is freedom to love.

Resentment comes from a misunderstanding many of us have about a situation or person. We believe they have wronged us and we come to hate a person. Remember that you called this person into your life, or at the very least allowed that person to enter your sphere. Think about the reasons why they were in your life. Acknowledge and appreciate their good qualities you loved about them. And, thank God for showing you the qualities in them that you could very much live without. It is especially the parts of a person that hurt you that has the most to offer you – the relationship is gone and over, but you now learned a little more about yourself in terms of what you want and don’t want in a relationship.

Nelson Mandela had several loves in his life, including three wives. Each of those wives, he loved deeply and considered them partners and soul mates. Two of the three marriages ended in divorce. Winnie Mandela allegedly cheated on Mr. Mandela and was emotionally neglectful to him– yet, he found love again at the age of 77, and died a happily married man at the age of 95. I read that in divorce court, Nelson Mandela smiled at his soon to be former wife, Winnie, but she turned away. He was sorrowful and humbled during the divorce proceedings and he spoke of his love and appreciation for his wife. He knew there was no hope for their relationship, but he chose to not be mired in pain and resentment towards his ex-wife.

Mr. Mandela’s story tells us that soul mates can come in many different forms and times in our lives. There are some loves in your life greater than others because of the chemistry or attachment you have to a person. As many times as you believe your soul mate is out there, is as many times your soul mate is forming and finding their way to you. Many people have great loves in their lives, not just one.

Allow yourself a little time to mourn the demise of a relationship, but write a reminder somewhere you can refer to that says when you’re ready and open, love is available to you. Dwelling in sadness only delays the recovery and the rediscovery of yourself in this life and of future loves to come. Don’t let unforgiveness of the person you once was in a relationship with slow down your momentum to a loving state of being with yourself, someone new, and old connections.

If you’ve ever tried to not think about something, then you likely know that it is almost impossible not to think about that very thing you’re trying to avoid thinking about. Deal with the feelings early and head on. Wallow, watch bad romantic comedies, cry, talk it out with friends and write in a journal. When you spend a little time mourning, remember there is a season for sadness and there is a season for moving. Take a trip, pick up a new hobby, or set up a regular volunteer activity to help move you into your new season of life and love. Don’t ignore your feelings, but don’t let them rule you or your life. Give yourself a break and have fun! Dating and making new friends is an adventure – the hunt for the love(s) of your life should be a good time, with a little contrast here and there. Isn’t that why we signed up for this thing called love and life anyway?

Finally, BE forgiveness. One of the qualities we want in our mates is the ability to forgive and humility. If those are qualities you want in others, make sure it’s something you have inside yourself as well. As a matter of fact, any trait you’d like to see in your partner, bring that energy into your own being right here, right now. BE the forgiveness. Appreciate – even if all you can think of is the negative in a person or situation. The negativity or adversity is only clarifying what it is you really want in your life, so have compassion for yourself and that person. Bless yourself and the other person by praying for you and them to be love and peace.

In relationships, there will be transgressions, arguments, and disagreements. A person who can quickly regroup and forgive is one that will succeed in life and love.

The cycle of forgiveness is necessary to keep mankind in love and in check. The moment you truly forgive, is the moment you are free from the prison of resentment. Forgiveness sets us all free, both the forgiven and the forgiving. The moment each of us wholeheartedly takes part in this beautiful cycle, the moment love blooms and dwells freely inside all of us.

~Your Curator of All Things Inspirational, Kimberly Jo Cooley

Blog Series: Freedom Consciousness

Abundant Life Initiative’s next blog series explores freedom consciousness. We will explore the following:

  1. Freedom in your spirit
  2. Freedom in your affairs
  3. Financial freedom
  4. Freedom to dream big
  5. Freedom to be who you want to be
  6. Freedom to choose

So many of us know and experience the physical form of freedom, but are we toting that same freedom consciousness in other areas of our lives?

  1. The first installment is Freedom in your spirit. What does it mean to be spiritually free? We will explore how many of our old belief systems adopted from our teachers and parents’ own spiritual interpretations shaped what we believed. Do these old beliefs still serve you, or are they limiting and minimizing who you are as an evolved person? Some beliefs may still work, while others may need to be let go. In this post, we will explore how religion and limiting beliefs shape and many times hinder a person’s spiritual growth instead of evolving or enhancing it.
  2. The second post discusses freedom in your affairs. Your affairs include your personal and professional experiences. Are you enjoying your job and where you work? If not, why? What about your personal relationships and experiences in your everyday life? Let’s explore what makes you feel more restricted and less free in your business and personal matters. What will it take for you to feel a little more free each day?
  3. The third blog installment discusses financial freedom. Some people seem to have it all and never have to worry about money. There are those who do not have a lot of money and express how rich they are anyway. Then there are those with or without money that bemoan what little they have. Abundance is more than just money in the bank, it is maximizing on what you do have, while making spiritual and physical room to receive more from the Universe. The best part of the abundance cycle? Sharing what you have with others! We will explore different ways to look at your situation so you can become more grateful for the financial freedom and abundance you do have.
  4. The fourth blog post explores freedom to dream big. Dream big, but take measured, action steps to get to what you want. Dreaming big, then bigger, then biggest prepares you to receive more. Often people are too afraid to dream big, for fear of getting let down. Are you constantly dreaming too small or becoming too narrow in your search for what you want to manifest, limiting the Universe to give you bigger and better? Lets find ways for you to begin to dream big and dream often.
  5. The fifth installment discusses freedom to be you in any and everything you do or encounter. Do you find yourself changing your tone and personality from person to person, and then losing your own voice in the process? What is it about you that makes you run away from becoming the person you truly want to be? Knowing your worth allows you to stay true to yourself and your values. We’ll explore how to always be your authentic self and why it’s good for manifesting.
  6. Finally, the sixth installment deals with the freedom to choose. Choice and free will is God’s gift to mankind. My people, we can choose! Now, it is time to learn how to practice this freedom and to rely on your intuition to always guide you to where you want to go and where you need to be.

I will include blogs and Podcast recommendations to further deepen our understanding of ways to incorporate more freedom in every area of our lives. I love hearing from my readers, so please share your thoughts on the upcoming freedom blog posts or suggest other topics we can discuss in the future.

~Your Curator of All Things Uplifting, Kimberly Jo Cooley

Mom, my First Love

Image courtesy of digitalart, published on 29 May 2011 Stock Image - image ID: 10043334, from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net.

Image courtesy of digitalart, published on 29 May 2011 Stock Image – image ID: 10043334, from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net.

My mother was my first love. She was my first love, even before my father, because my first recollection of feeling something like love, was when she’d have to go to work and I’d be left with a babysitter or other relatives. I longed for her company, her hugs, kisses, and smiles. She would play games with me – long tea party sessions and make-believe camping trips where we’d fight off attacking bears (Square Toes is what we called a particularly aggressive bear, lol).

Back in the 1980s, it was easier to bring and keep your child at work. My mother worked in the San Francisco and worked at least fifty to sixty hour work weeks. I would go with her to work on Saturdays and play as if I was a banker. I think that’s how I learned to type, as I played on the old typing and adding machines with other little kids who were there, too. We’d run from cubicle to cubicle, taking papers, pens, and any other office supplies we could fashion into airplanes or paper dolls. My mother and their mothers never scolded us.

She worked for Crocker Bank, started in the check processing lockboxes and moved her way up to computer operations. Crocker Bank was bought out by Wells Fargo, which merged with First Interstate, then Norwest, and now Wells Fargo again. I remember her and her co-worker/friends smoking cigarettes as they worked on mainframe systems. The air was cold and smelled of faint cigarette smoke and new computer machines, fresh out of the box. She was a computer operator and I was fascinated watching her work with these big, smart machines.

After work, we’d shop at Esprit, or Emporium, and then head to the toy store. I remember a doctors kit from TJ Maxx she bought for me. We’d stop at Woolworths for some candy and no matter how tired my mom was, she’d let me talk to the pet birds and fish they sold. Then we’d catch the BART train back to Oakland, and people watch. At night, she would read as many books as I’d give her, often reading stories over and over again.

Everyday my mom tirelessly walked to the bus stop, caught the bus to the train, worked all day, then caught the same buses and trains back to pick me up. One time, she picked me up from daycare. We stopped and picked up a pizza slice from Cybelle’s. As soon as I got that lovely piece of thick crust and pepperoni, it dropped and splattered on the ground. I threw a fit. My mom, ever the appeaser, tried to buy another slice, but the parlor didn’t have anymore pizza slices that were ready. My mom consoled me enough to go home. She had a little surprises for me in her bags, sweets or toys, I can’t remember. What I do remember is she was a magician in my eyes and all-powerful enough to make things alright.

My mom: so smart, so beautiful, so loving, and so kind and indeed, was my first love.

Love you, Mommie. Thank you for always being so selfless, giving and loving to me, Jenni, and your grandkids. We’ve been so blessed and taken care of for as long as I can remember, because God packaged you into the amazing woman who you are. I aspire to be just like you when I become a grandmother. Thank you.

~Your Curator of all Things Inspirational, Kimberly Jo Cooley

Deliberately Creating, Affirming and Allowing, Part One

Image courtesy of dan, published on 31 January 2010 Stock Photo - image ID: 10012029, from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

Image courtesy of dan, published on 31 January 2010
Stock Photo – image ID: 10012029, from http://www.freedigitalphotos.net

I was asked about deliberate creation, from http://justmeandyoukid.com/: I still don’t understand deliberate creation. How do you deliberately create a great day? Is it a self-mantra that you repeat, an attitude? How does this happen for you?

I am thankful for the questions above because we will answer each of them this week as we delve into what deliberately creating our life is all about.

The answer is when we make a conscious decision to deliberately create our thoughts and our lives, everything changes from that moment forward. The Universe conspires to bring forth your desire. Things will begin to shift to bring you closer to what you desire.

To deliberately create is to decide and to say to yourself what it is you wish to create (and to believe, have faith that it will be done). You can affirm aloud or to yourself. You can write in a journal or paint it in a picture. You can create a dream board or daydream. All of these are modalities in deliberately creating what you want.

The key is to be honest with yourself about your life’s desires and values and stay focused on them. This way, you are not wasting time creating a mish mash of what you do and don’t want.

We can haphazardly create our lives, with no focus. We all know what our lives look like without deliberately thinking about what we want to create.

Think of a business plan, as compared to deliberately creating. You can write a business plan, but do you do not know all the specific results that will come of it, nor can you anticipate all that may come up. You know generally that your business plan will garner certain results, as opposed to not having a business plan at all. The same with an outline for a novel or an actual outline of drawing. You know generally what is being created because you’ve created the outline. Now, picture your drawn outline image, and God coming in to fill in the colors and depths of that image. That is how deliberate creation works.

You are creating the outline, which is the what and why, and God is filling it up with the who, when, where and how. Always remember your role and part in deliberate creating. Your job is to deliberately create what you want, remain in a place of allowing and gratitude, remain faithful and then to be thankful when you’ve manifested what you want.

Your unique desires are direct expressions of God Spirit, so of course God says “Yes” when you ask and affirm what you wish to create.

Deliberate creation and allowing work hand in hand. When you deliberately create (your business plan or novel outline), information is sent out to the Universe to bring forth what you desire back to you. When you allow the fruits of that creative thought to come back, the easier it is to manifest what you want. Sometimes the fruits do not look like what you wanted to bear from your deliberate thoughts. But, always remember there are different vantage points to things and situations, and the blessing is always there, just not yet revealed to you in a way you can comprehend or see yet.

It is important to think about your values and desires for your life, and listen to your intuition. Your intuition will guide and tell you when you are hitting resistance or when you are flowing with Divine Spirit.

I will leave you with a list of my own affirmations that I said this week and last, so you can see the modality of affirmations in play in deliberate creation. Borrow or create your own and say them regularly.

  • I am an extension of God.
  • For in Him, I live, and move, and have my being.
  • I am abundant.
  • I am well, whole, perfect and complete.
  • I am love.
  • I am peace.
  • I am free.
  • I am creative.
  • I am a friend.
  • I am triumphant in everything I do, no matter the outcome.

~Your Curator of all Things Inspirational, Kimberly Jo Cooley

 

Your Values Are Always Your Guide

Wonder what your values are? The answer lies in your desires and what you enjoy doing most.

I used to think values had more to do with morals than they did with desires. Values are what guide us towards what we truly want for our lives.

Each of us have values that are exclusively unique to our selves. If we are constantly doing things to sabotage or dim our values, we find ourselves in constant resistance to alignment with our Spirit.

When we dissect an area of our life, we should know what we value and always ask if what we are about to say or do is in alignment with our unique values. Our values are the key to our life’s purpose and the foundation to our eternal peace and knowing. Our values are divinely contracted by God to each of us, so we can live the best life we can and be the vessels of God’s purpose.

My ten top values are:

  • My spiritual evolution
  • Living a healthy and fit lifestyle
  • Spending time with my kids
  • Spending time with my husband
  • Creativity
  • Things of beauty
  • Friendships/Kinship
  • Freedom
  • Life’s work that feeds my soul and the souls of others
  • Keeping it simple (includes finances, choices, home life – a way of life)

If my values are shining bright, I’m a happy and aligned woman. When my life is cluttered with things I don’t want to do or circumstances that collide with my values, then I am out of alignment with Spirit and probably not in the best of moods.

Now that I’ve identified my values,  it’s time to look at how much of my life is filled with experiences that support what really matters most to me. From here on out, everything I think and do must be aligned with these values.

Whenever you’re confronted with a choice, from small to big, ask yourself which is the better option that is more in alignment with your values. Always pick the option that supports your individual and unique values. Not the values of your mother, or your spouse. Too often we are looking at other people’s values and trying them on, only to find they are ill-fitting. We can’t wear other’s values, and the more we try, the more we suffer.

People with similar values typically flock to each other. If you find yourself in a situation where your values are not in alignment with family or friends, don’t worry about that. Focus in on your values and how to flesh them out more. Those who resonate with your vibrational frequency will get closer to you, others who are not a match will go away, gradually or quickly. Fortunately, like attracts like.

What are your top ten values? What can you do today, for five minutes, to squeeze out more juice in your life by supporting your values? Are there pockets in your life that causes you to be pushed further away from your values, like constantly working, living above your means, spending time with people who drain you? Knowing and tending to your values will set you free.

~Your Curator of all Things Inspirational, Kimberly Jo Cooley

 

My Abundant Life Initiative

What does initiating an abundant life mean for me? I will show you. I am starting with myself – focusing on areas of my life and seeing where I am six months from now. I will share my values and dreams and the highs and lows, frustrations and ecstatic moments of attaining and maintain them.

I am initiating abundance of love, friendship, freedom, and spirituality in my life, and will take each of you on the journey with me. It is my hope that you will read about my experiences and then see areas in your life that could use a soul stirring transformation.

I will name the areas I am focusing on and will devote at least five minutes to them each day. It is my hope the minutes will increase and over time, that area will have transformed. I will devote a blog post a week to where I am in my areas of focus.

When I first started this blog, I envisioned a website where people could come for information on how to live the life they truly want. Many people have lost touch with the life they truly want to live. I wanted this initiative to be a collective effort and encourage people to take initiative in creating an abundant life for ourselves and others.

What better way to illustrate how to initiate an abundant life, than to document and share my own experience. Thank you for going on this journey with me.

~Your Curator of all Things Inspirational, Kimberly Jo Cooley